How To Be The Perfect Asian Kid

Score 1600 on the SAT.

Play the violin or piano on the level of a concert performer.

Apply to and be accepted by 27 colleges.

Have three hobbies: studying, studying, and studying.

Go to a prestigious Ivy League university and win enough scholarship to pay for it.

Love classical music and detest talking on the telephone.

Become a Westinghouse, Presidential, and eventually a Rhodes Scholar.

Aspire to be a brain surgeon.

Marry Asian-American doctor and have perfect, successful children (grandkids for ahma and ah-gongh!)

Love to hear stories about your parents' childhood...especially the one about walking 7 miles to school without shoes.

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