The Divorce...A man was summoned to court for punching his lawyer.
During the process, the Judge asked him to explain his actions.
"Your Honor," replied the defendant, "that man represented me in a bitter divorce. One day he said my property settlement hearing was about to be held. The judge would decide that afternoon what I would get, and what Rose would get. My lawyer told me I didn't have to be present and "not to worry."
"I can't see why you'd punch a man for that," interrupted the judge.
"Wait, there's more...
When I asked my attorney later about the settlement, he told me to look on the bright side. I asked why.
Then he said, "Because everything's coming up Rose's."
"THAT'S when I hit him!"